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Sunday, June 27, 2010

Paranoia Personified

It was early evening and she was home alone. A typical, idyllic day on the ranch. At least until she came out of the bedroom and saw a stranger in her kitchen. The animal took over as she cried out, “What the f**k are you doing in my house?” He ran up the stairs with her in pursuit. They met on the landing; the intruder had a blanket over his head. She snatched it away to get a look at him as he pushed her down. He left by the front door and jumped into his pickup truck which had been backed up to the door and had the tailgate down. She was at his heels as he sped up the driveway.


“She” is my wife and “he” is now in jail thanks to modern technology. More of that later. As some of you may know, we reside on a forty acre parcel in a rural area of Northern California. Eleven other similar parcels comprise our neighborhood and a gate exists at the front of our road to keep folks from exploring our properties and the river that winds through them. The gate suffered fatal injuries in a collision several months ago and its absence may have well contributed to my wife’s event. But then again, access to entry codes in a small town is easily obtained.


Regardless, our seeming island of tranquility amidst the madness of 21st century humanity had been invaded. I was on my way to work when the deed went down and promptly turned around for home when my wife called. By the time I got back to our house, the local Sheriff’s deputies were ons scene doing what they do: dusting for prints, taking pictures, and recording information. I got busy with the requisite cancellation of credit cards and such. In addition to my wife’s purse/wallet, the robber got her new iPhone that had been activated mere hours before and our pistol. (The top drawer of the nightstand may not be the best place for your gun, by the way.)


It struck me suddenly that an accompanying feature of the phone was Mobile Me. This allows the wireless syncing of data and it included a “Find My iPhone” option. Lo and behold, after a push of a button and a few moments to allow for refinement, a bulls-eye appeared over a home in our nearby town. The deputy on scene quickly relayed the information and soon thereafter my wife was looking at a photo array of possible perpetrators. She selected the photo corresponding to the suspect residing in the house displayed on my monitor and the search warrant was prepared.


The Sheriffs elected to wait until morning to serve the warrant, but the suspect thwarted their attempt and, instead, led them on a high speed chase through the countryside, throwing items out his window all the while. I came to know this by once again asking my computer to find my iPhone. It was now somewhere in the middle of nowhere. I called the detective who told me of the chase and he was now attempting to locate the phone on the side of the road. Once again, I led him to the proper spot while looking at a satellite image on my monitor. “Go to the next big tree on your left” was the gist of my directions since their were no structures in the vicinity. Once he got close, I selected yet another option which sent a signal to the phone and it began to chirp. The cops heard it, found it, and also found our pistol nearby.


The suspect now resides within the walls of our county jail and has been linked to several other robberies/burglaries in the area. Whether this goes to trial remains to be seen, but no one can claim a better result from a decidedly undesirable event. End of story? No. In fact the true story is just beginning.


When one’s boundaries are violated, an instinct kicks in that spurs actions to prevent a similar event. The boundaries can be personal, regional, or national. The attacks of 9-11 differ from my wife’s only in scope as both of the relative boundaries, drawing a line between bliss and barbarism, were shown to be simple façades. The TSA and other homeland security measures arose from the ashes of the World Trade Center and we were faced with a similar motive of establishing obstacles to future invaders. A “build a moat” mentality takes precedence over all else and, left unchecked, results in major expenditures of time and money.


To what end, though? While my home and family might be more secure with alarm systems, gates, sub-gates, motion detectors, flood lights, guard dogs, and who-knows-what-else we have mortgaged our freedom in exchange. Our open spaces are now defined by lines of defense and the sense of tranquility has been replaced by the dull hum of apprehension. The trade-off seems unpalatable and I am successfully fighting the urge to transform my paradise into a penitentiary.


Yes, we’ve examined our habit patterns and changed some of our routines. I’ve installed some economical security systems and, yes, the gate will soon be replaced at the top of our community’s road. Some have suggested we trade in our three dogs for one with an attitude (and teeth). Not gonna happen, folks. All that would do is guarantee several medical bills or lawsuits from dog bites to protect against an event which will, more than likely, never recur.


It will take some time to return to our sense of normality, but I’m confident that we will come to the point where our lives will go on relatively unchanged. I’m sorry that we cannot necessarily say the same for the country. Air travel is now more of an arduous trek and paranoia seems to be our current national frame of mind. A moat around my house or our nation will solve nothing of substance and we will pay a steep price should we choose to dig.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

When

This is a word commonly heard when refilling a coffee cup, iced tea glass, or maybe even upon being served a portion of food. In this context, saying “when” signals that you are pleased with the current amount offered. “When” also has commercial applications, but in those instances it generally refers to reaching an intolerable level of abuse.


The pilots of Spirit Airlines recently said “when” and withheld their services after a protracted (and fruitless) negotiation period with their management team. After several days of walking a picket line, their differences with the airline were settled and they are back in their cockpits. Nurses in Minneapolis recently staged a one-day strike to protest proposed staffing levels. Striking nurses? My god, people will die! No, they won’t. The union must give ten days notice of a job action to allow hospitals the time for rescheduling elective procedures and transferring patients.


One might think that, what with a national unemployment figure hovering around 10%, this would be a terrible time to say “when”. We should feel lucky to have a job, right? Well, many of the unemployed have a specific set of skills that cannot be universally applied to other positions while others have no specific skills, at all. In the meantime, those who can claim continued employment find that the continued increase in productivity with a stagnated wage is drawing them ever-nearer to the point of “when”.


Imagine for a moment that you have been diagnosed with a slow moving infection that originated in the tip of your little finger on your non-writing hand. It is incurable and your only way to fight it is the amputation of affected tissue as it advances. First goes your pinkie, then your hand. But you write with the other one, so you cope and adapt. But then you lose your lower arm and then the whole thing. Slowly, inexorably, you are less and less. Until you get to that point where continued decimation is no longer a viable option. “Let me go”, is your new mantra as the fight is no longer commensurate with the reward.


Worker bees are approaching the same point in their careers. Slowly, inexorably, their pay and quality of life have diminished to a point where continued effort to maintain seems ridiculous. Some have no choice but to hang on and hang in while hoping for a more benevolent time. Others simply quit and go their separate ways. And others are afforded the protection of an organization that unifies their concerns into a chorus that cannot be ignored. We call these organizations labor unions. Unions have not enjoyed much success over the past decade, or so, but I can’t help but believe that their renaissance is afoot. The labor/management pendulum has reached its maximum arc to the side of the bosses and must now start the return swing to labor. Legislation that makes it easier for employee groups to organize will add to the momentum as more and more laborers say “when”.


Nurses, airline pilots, teachers, and other labor groups are seeking avenues of redress and an organization that protects members of the work group while voicing displeasure seems to fit their bill. They now have the ability to say “when” while fighting for a better future for themselves and for those that require their services. The issue at hand is rarely as simple as “pay”, but that reason is usually quoted in articles and interviews. More often than not, other issues outweigh the size of the paycheck. Hospital staffing, classroom size, and pilot fatigue are just some of the issues facing those within the associated industries and society is better served when these concerns are addressed. The sad truth seems to be that, without the security of an organized work force, such concerns can be ignored.


There is a difference in saying “when” and withholding services. Only after unsuccessful negotiations and unresolved shortcomings in the workplace will a strike be called. It is, after all, used as a last resort and will be settled sooner if would-be opportunists resist the lure of crossing the picket line. Scabs have been around since the advent of striking and “scab” simply stands for “Still Collecting All Benefits”. An ugly name, to be sure, but a logical methodology behind the acronym. Whether the individual comes from the outside or within the union’s ranks, the act does nothing but delay a solution to a long festering impasse. In the meantime, the end user receives something less than the level of expertise normally provided by those on the picket line. Some strikes are broken if enough scabs are willing to cross the picket line, but after several months the scabs, themselves, realize that the job is no longer worth keeping and move on to other opportunities.


Unfortunately, there will always be collateral damages during any strike: passengers, patients, students, and customers of all kinds. The ability to say “when” is essential, though, if we are to maintain a balance between those that seek profit over progress and those that care more for quality over quantity.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Too Big to Succeed

We’ve all seen how bureaucracies seem to be the least effective when most needed and I can’t help but wonder why this is the case? Are they destined to fail? Are they infiltrated with incompetents? Just crazy enough to be true, but I doubt it.


Let’s start a business, you and I. OK, now we need some employees. Who’s going to oversee them? Well, I guess we’ll need a manager for that cuz you and I are involved in the frying of bigger fish. Payroll? We need an accountant and office manager. Oops: someone got hurt and is filing a workman’s comp claim. We need to get an insurance guru that knows how to handle that. And, before you know it, we’ve got us a bureaucracy! Each of those main players we’ve brought on will, in time, need their own main players and the corporate layers will grow accordingly.


Further dilution and separation of responsibilities will occur as a matter of course and in the name of “efficiency”. You and I are happy because our company seems to operating at its fullest potential. Our organizational chart is a thing to behold, what with its universe of divisions and departments. Life is good.


Until the operation goes very much awry and decisions are needed now so actions can follow immediately thereafter. A fire? No problem: who’s got the key to the fire extinguishers? Well, let’s check with the Fire Prevention Unit. That guy’s on vacation, though. Who’d he place in charge? Can’t tell by looking at the chart. Hell, let’s break the lock. Who authorizes the breaking of corporate property? Don’t know. Where’s the crash axe? We stored them with the fire extinguishers. It made sense at the time.


The Keystone Kops would have been proud to play a part in our little skit. But this kind of comedic catastrophe plays itself out every day yet the bureaucracy survives. We have a panel to study what went wrong and why, rearrange or realign the departments, maybe fire a few scapegoats, and then proudly proclaim that the system is now safe and ready for anything. Until that “anything” occurs, of course. Does it come as a surprise to anyone why we have come to distrust a bureaucracy? I wouldn’t think so and it follows that our distrust flows surely to our governments (local, state, and federal) because they seem to have perfected the art of bureaucratization. So what do we do about it?


Accept it. “What?”, you shout. Well, with some exceptions, but the nature of a bureaucracy is no different than that of a scorpion or rattlesnake. Sooner or later, when dealing with one or the other, you are likely to be bitten. It is simply the nature of the beast in question. A bureaucracy, though, is man-made and can be altered (over time) to provide a more streamlined and timely response to problems. That involves the elimination of many departments and their associated personnel and is precisely why it will not occur overnight. Shrinking through attrition is the most equitable solution, I’d say, and, in the meantime, I’d suggest that every bureaucracy has a Disaster Czar with ultimate authority and control. And even then, problems would arise, but hopefully fewer and smaller ones.


No one can deny that corporate and governmental ne’er-do-wells use a bureaucracy for political or professional cover when things go wrong on their watch. Conversely, many good folks with honorable intentions get chewed up in the same grist mill. And we just can’t tell one from the other, can we? All we can do is try to simplify the structure that leads to such undesirable conclusions. In the meantime, however, we are left with debacles similar to the current BP mess in the Gulf of Mexico. We have a corporate bureaucracy trying to co-exist with a political one. It’s like watching two teenagers learn to waltz: countless missteps and bruised toes.


Many conglomerates in the financial crisis were labeled as too big to fail and were subsequently offered public assistance. I submit that many of our bureaucracies are too big to succeed and must be simplified and allowed to atrophy so as to reach a size that lends itself to greater success. (How about starting with the IRS?)

Monday, June 7, 2010

Bayou Bewilderment

As I write this, the Louisiana shore is awash with oil and more is to come over the next several months. Mississippi, Alabama, and Florida are also affected with fouled beaches and wetlands as experts tell us that even the Carolina shores may be subjected to a similar fate should ocean currents act as predicted. Anger is as abundant as the oil spilling from the doomed well and just as crude. And who can blame those most affected by this disaster? From business owners to property owners to tourists. Perhaps more perilous and long-lasting is the loss of wildlife and habitat. The future of the Gulf Coast is bleak.


British Petroleum is no more successful with damage control than it has been in stopping its leak. Whether a mile below the ocean’s surface or three inches from a microphone, attempts to stem the flow of oil or turn the tide of public opinion have failed. Who do we blame? BP? Halliburton? Transocean? Washington regulators? To be sure, there’s plenty to go around and only time will tell if the truly guilty parties are brought to justice.


In the meantime, collective hearts go out to those living in close proximity to the damage. What with the scope of the oil slick, can there be any surprise at a moratorium on further deep water drilling? How else can we get our proverbial ducks in a row and try to prevent any replays? Well, I guess Louisiana’s Governor Bobby Jindal is surprised. He is as angry at this prospect as the spill, maybe even more so. It seems that his rationale centers on the fact that the oil industry and its associated drilling are essential parts of Louisiana’s economy. And without the drilling, folks will go broke.


I’m confused: first heard are screams of outrage at the sight of unleashed crude oil washing up on barrier islands and beaches. Then, when a timeout is declared to review, rewrite, and re-implement deep water drilling procedures and regulations an even louder scream arises from the same group! Can they be serious? Apparently they are and their demands bring this attempt to have it both ways into sharp focus.


Who doesn’t want their cake and then eat it, too? We were all taught that such dreams are simply that: dreams. Unattainable goals. But our local, state, and federal governments have spent the past several decades convincing us that such dreams can be found in a political reality where boons are provided absent the banes of payment. A quid without a quo, if you will. And we’ve been more than happy to buy into this flimflammery. So why not apply the same reasoning to the BP fiasco? Make ‘em pay, make sure it never happens again, but keep drilling so I can keep my job.


It seems that, as a country, we are finally coming to terms with the concept of paying the bill for what we get. Unfortunately, it also seems that only the other guy should pay for what the other guy gets. Our stuff is important and we really need it, but that other stuff used by that other guy is wasteful and must be stopped or he must find a way to pay for it. Social Security, Medicare, subsidies, you name it: all “programs” offered by our political institutions have come with a price tag long ignored. Many think that our continued spiral into ever-increasing deficits may prove to be our undoing. Your guess is as good as mine, but one thing I do know: don’t ask for my prayers, my pennies, or my “pitching in” if you’re expecting your cash flow and the conditions that contributed to your misery be allowed to continue unabated.


If the consequences of Louisiana’s decision to continue deep water drilling were to remain within their state borders, I’d have little to say about it. But the BP disaster will have far-reaching ramifications. The Pelican State is in danger of losing its pelicans plus countless other assets and the fallout of this event will carry far beyond her confines. Much must change and the change must begin with a reappraisal of past practices regardless of the short term economic impact.