Charity Revisited

The Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays are upon us and one of the normal protocols is the plea for charitable donations so the hungry and needy can also enjoy the season. Charity refers to the giving of those in need. Could someone please define “in need” for me? Don’t get me wrong: I’m as generous as the next guy, but I can’t help but wonder if my “investment” is charity or tom-foolery.

There was a time when public assistance of any kind was considered to be an unenviable position. There was no pride while standing in a soup line. Times have changed, though. Traditional venues for those “in need” have become a haven for those “in want”. “It’s free so I’m getting mine while I can.” And there is no way to determine the eligibility of the poor souls lining up for the handouts.

I volunteered at a homeless holiday (Christmas) dinner almost twenty years ago when I was living in Southern California. It had always seemed like a good way to offer my services for a good cause. It provided food and a blanket for all and a present for each of the attending kids. My job was pouring drinks and bussing tables. I tried to engage each participant in a bit of idle chatter, but was surprised to find that most had nothing to say. Not even “thanks”. To make it worse, the entrance closed early because “repeat diners” were coming through the line a second time to obtain another blanket/present. Hardly a heart warming experience.

It is impossible to believe that things have gotten better in the ensuing years. As a matter of fact, I’d bet that most would believe the opposite. So how do we continue our charitable efforts while ensuring the validity of those asking for charity? We ask for something back in return for our assistance. What if the local charity offered food and shelter to only known individuals who were truly down on their luck, but striving to regain their footing on the financial ladder? No strangers and no familiar miscreants that have given nothing of themselves for themselves or their community. This isn’t mean or unemotional. It is merely requiring the quid for the quo. Yes, there will always be scofflaws and scalawags taking something they do not deserve, but standards such as this would go a long way in deterring such behavior.

I can no longer find it in my heart to donate food and clothing to unnamed individuals who may feel more entitled to my donations than appreciative. Nor should you. There is a homeless man who frequents the street outside of the Miami hotel I use on airline layovers. Over time, I have gotten to where we “greet” each other when I pass. I once asked him what he would do with the dollar I might give him. “Beer, cigarettes, whatever I need”, was his reply. The key word was “need”. He doesn’t need nicotine or alcohol. He wants them. While I admired his honesty, the response made it easy for me to refrain from donating to his cause.

I have taken other pleas to the heart while on city streets, but they include some extra steps on my part: rather than merely providing spare change, etc., I take my pan-handler into the nearest convenience store. I give the cashier the money I wish to donate and direct that all purchases are for food and non-alcoholic drink. What my homeless friend doesn’t spend goes to the cashier. A little more involved, but much more gratifying as I am now assured that my input will go towards needs rather than wants.

Those holding “will work for food” signs should be given some work to do. Tell the “applicant” to meet you at the same place tomorrow for some extraneous work around your house and see if he shows up. Sadly, most don’t. They want you to think they’re looking for work when, in fact, they’re looking for a free lunch. And it is up to us to know the difference.

There are many worthy causes out there, be they individuals or organizations. The problem lies in the fact that many others strive to prey upon the kindness of others to gain in ways undeserved. Heartless? Miserly? Conceited? Nope...just a guy looking for a return on my investment. The return I’m interested in is the betterment of that individual and of the society around us. While I may never gain individually, we will all gain should that street-person re-enter the work force or perform some other community service in return for the kindness shown. Isn’t it time to remove the sense of entitlement from a charitable gesture? I think so.